frustration

Have you ever wanted to literally step in someone else's shoes and get them to do what they should already be doing?
My husband is a great guy.  We were friends for years before we dated, and dated for years before we married.  Throughout most of this time he has had depression.  Like serious depression.
I have supported him financially, emotionally, physically and mentally through this time. And i am starting to get to the end of my rope.  His depression has seemed to get worse after our daughter was born and a few weeks ago he was making some fairly serious threats to hurt himself.
I have asked him so many times to go for therapy (he is in a waiting line for a psychiatrist and on medication at the moment, but won't try anything else). I gave him the website of a clinic that has therapists that meet right by his work and i also gave him a crisis hotline so he could call a professional if he was having those feelings. I even suggested we go straight to the emergency room to see if they would admit him, but nothing.
He has finally called the therapists and is sort of in the process of figuring that out. But i doubt he will follow through unless i force him too.
I can't even look him in the eye right now. It sounds horrible and selfish but i am just so hurt by his recent comments.  He not only said he would kill himself and leave me and out daughter alone because we "would be better off without him", but he also said we shouldn't have any more babies since he didn't want to pass along the depression gene.  If you have read any of my other entries you know we are trying to have another baby. Like the night he made his threats we should have been having sex as it was my peak night.  
I am just so hurt. In addition to the fear of losing him and living with that the rest of my life and the rest of Baby A's life, the one thing i have wanted and worked so hard for and he would take that away.  I keep telling him to try alternative therapies to help with his depression, but he doesn't even bother.  He says he has tried everything (which he certainly has not).  
I just said to him that i think that is bullshit.  Especially once you have a kid.  You have to keep trying and trying and fight every second of every day to feel better.  That is what i do.
His father had depression and his mother left when they had been married for 25 years.  I never understood how she could leave her husband and her children.  But now i am starting to get it a bit more (although i would never leave my kids.  Not for anything. But I would take her/them with me if it got that horrendous).
He is just stagnating.  Not finishing school, not looking for a job, not even talking to his boss to confirm the end date of his current contract so we know when we no longer have money coming in.  He doesn't get it, and it is literally going to destroy my life.
Again i know i sound selfish, but it is the reality of the situation.  If he doesn't get help, or let me help him get help, then we are fucked.